Super Moms Are Not Always Super
1:58:00 AM
It's common
nowadays to find mothers who work and care for their children at
the same time. There are probably millions of super moms out there juggling household chores, day jobs, the married life and kids. I am pretty sure that majority of them are either single, or a little too young and having difficulty in raising a first baby, but is overcoming the odds anyway.
A Woman is Born to Be a Mother
Women are natural nurturers, and it's not in a woman's instinct to abandon or neglect her own child. In fact women tend to go above and beyond their own capabilities, just to protect their children. We are capable of sacrificing out of love. This great love drives women like us to push beyond our limits, even put our own health at risk just to provide for our baby's needs.
How I Tried to Be a Super Mom
I am a mom, first and foremost, secondly a wife, patient and enduring. When I found out I was pregnant the responsibility of raising a child properly scared me more than anything. This fear pushed me to aim for what's best for my son. I am an online writer, a part-time illustrator, blogger, ran an online store and now trying out pay per clicks as a source of income.
All the work I do and responsibilities, I do from home. In any other situation this would have been the most convenient thing ever. The work I do is convenient now don’t get me wrong, it's still more difficult because motherhood, housework and work-work don't always mesh so well. There are tough times intertwined with the happy ones. As a work-at-home mom, I experienced many times when I would feel exhausted, sleepy, hungry and dizzy. Nowadays, I've managed to balance things out. Back then, however, I wouldn't always tell my husband or show it and kept working anyway.
The rest I took was the time when I am with my son; whether I was changing his diaper, feeding him, bathing him or swaying him to sleep. I did almost everything and felt energetic, sometimes, about all I was able to accomplish. My "sense of purpose" bar brimmed to the top and I was very proud of myself.
How My Being a Super Mom Did Us Harm
I hardly bothered with vitamins because I always forgot. Each of every day I gave my full attention to work and what my son needed: food, vitamins, diaper change, bath, nap, sleep, day out, fresh air, sunlight and it goes on and on. But I always forgot myself, even when i felt cold, my head ached or my body shook from hunger.
One day I had one of the worst flu cases in my life. It's difficult to work when you're sick, that's obvious enough. What's worse is that somehow passed it on to my husband and baby. He was 7 months at the time. My son got sick for four days with fluctuating temperatures and my husband hit a dangerously high temperature for two consecutive nights. We were short on money since I had been sick; despite being sick myself I had to pull in what energy I had left to care for my husband and son. It took me two full weeks of rest and recovery, before I was able to work again.
Like most hard core moms, I felt like I failed in protecting my son from a terrible viral sickness; and it came from me. I wasn't sure how to deal with the disappointment from myself. I had been trying hard to provide baby necessities but endangered my husband and son's health in the process.
A Friendly Reminder to Super Moms
A Woman is Born to Be a Mother
Women are natural nurturers, and it's not in a woman's instinct to abandon or neglect her own child. In fact women tend to go above and beyond their own capabilities, just to protect their children. We are capable of sacrificing out of love. This great love drives women like us to push beyond our limits, even put our own health at risk just to provide for our baby's needs.
How I Tried to Be a Super Mom
I am a mom, first and foremost, secondly a wife, patient and enduring. When I found out I was pregnant the responsibility of raising a child properly scared me more than anything. This fear pushed me to aim for what's best for my son. I am an online writer, a part-time illustrator, blogger, ran an online store and now trying out pay per clicks as a source of income.
All the work I do and responsibilities, I do from home. In any other situation this would have been the most convenient thing ever. The work I do is convenient now don’t get me wrong, it's still more difficult because motherhood, housework and work-work don't always mesh so well. There are tough times intertwined with the happy ones. As a work-at-home mom, I experienced many times when I would feel exhausted, sleepy, hungry and dizzy. Nowadays, I've managed to balance things out. Back then, however, I wouldn't always tell my husband or show it and kept working anyway.
The rest I took was the time when I am with my son; whether I was changing his diaper, feeding him, bathing him or swaying him to sleep. I did almost everything and felt energetic, sometimes, about all I was able to accomplish. My "sense of purpose" bar brimmed to the top and I was very proud of myself.
How My Being a Super Mom Did Us Harm
I hardly bothered with vitamins because I always forgot. Each of every day I gave my full attention to work and what my son needed: food, vitamins, diaper change, bath, nap, sleep, day out, fresh air, sunlight and it goes on and on. But I always forgot myself, even when i felt cold, my head ached or my body shook from hunger.
One day I had one of the worst flu cases in my life. It's difficult to work when you're sick, that's obvious enough. What's worse is that somehow passed it on to my husband and baby. He was 7 months at the time. My son got sick for four days with fluctuating temperatures and my husband hit a dangerously high temperature for two consecutive nights. We were short on money since I had been sick; despite being sick myself I had to pull in what energy I had left to care for my husband and son. It took me two full weeks of rest and recovery, before I was able to work again.
Like most hard core moms, I felt like I failed in protecting my son from a terrible viral sickness; and it came from me. I wasn't sure how to deal with the disappointment from myself. I had been trying hard to provide baby necessities but endangered my husband and son's health in the process.
A Friendly Reminder to Super Moms
For super moms out there, new-found ones and veterans, I know you never seem to run out of energy when it comes to your kids, but sometimes taking care of ourselves is a gift we can give our children too. It's true we have this bottomless pocket where we get our energy and determination, especially when it comes to our kids. Despite that, we still have weaknesses, bad days and critical spots.
Super moms are not always super after all.
If we’re not healthy enough or strong enough, no one can support our children or protect them from harm. In my case, I brought the cold to him by disregarding my own health. Although my intentions were mostly selfless, in the end it seemed more selfish than helpful. Trying to be “super” and pushing limits slammed me into a corner I couldn't dissolve.
There is still a
limit in doing everything for your kid.
But a healthy and “present” mom,
physically and mentally,
is all a child needs in the end.
11 comments
Hi Mean. I'm so glad you found true happiness in your little boy. And I can see marriage is hard as I myself am preparing for that kasi ikakasal na kami ni Ian next year. I'll be looking forward to your new posts in the future!
ReplyDeleteAwww... Thanks Laine, WOW! Really? FINALLY you're getting married! :3 I am amazed sainyo ni Ian, actually, despite the distance you're still well bonded. I am very happy for you both, I'm sure whatever crease your relationship goes through either of you will find a way to make things better :) Congrats in advance and thank you ulit for reading my blog :)
DeleteA mom must be intelligent, smart and very versatile for her family. Likewise, parenting is forever and mother knows best.
ReplyDeleteMother's are very selfless but it shouldn't always be like that. This is a good reminder to mothers to also think of themselves. And this is a good challenge for the children to help out their mother with life.
ReplyDeleteMoms are also humans and not at all superheroes but they still intend to exert their time and effort to provide help and care to family. I think this is the foremost reason why they are called supermoms.
ReplyDeleteAlmost a Super mom ka na sis., except that you forgot to take care of your health. good advice for moms ito.
ReplyDeleteI am a single parent. I live this life as both mom and dad to my two girls and I officially held the title for almost 9 years. The home I was trying to portray to my children, how kind of a mother - I am to them and how I respect them as two human beings given by God to me.
ReplyDeleteat this time, moms are too protective or playing to be too much of being a stage mother that making their children too dependent and forgetting to stand on their own.
ReplyDeleteSuper Moms can really do a lot of things but they too are prone of getting sick so it would really be important to not only be super but healthy as well.
ReplyDeleteI feel you. I also work hard that I almost find time to be with my kids. Devoting time really means a lot and I'm thankful that I knew now how to manage my time with work and family. Anyway, we are SUPER MOMS in our own way. - KarenT
ReplyDeleteIt's why right now, I make sure to help my sister who has 2 children to take care of them if she's doing something. I'm feeling like a surrogate dad already! :D
ReplyDeleteShare your thoughts, suggestions, feedback. I'm happy to improve on my blog!